Effective Communication Skills – 10

The Power of Positive and Comforting Words

Lord Ram assessed and briefed Lakshman about the communication skills of Hanuman on their first interaction through slokas 4-3-31 and 4-3-32. Nine amazing skills extolled by Lord Ram are Being not too elaborate, Unambiguous, Not delayed, Harmonious, Speech raising from the chest or the throat, Conveying in comfortable medium tone, Orderly flow, Wonderful delivery, and speaking positive and comforting words. This assessment was possible because Ram listened to Hanuman patiently.

Now Skill 10, i.e., Speaking positive and comforting words:

संस्कार क्रम संपन्नाम् अद्भुताम् अविलम्बिताम् |
उच्चारयति कल्याणीम् वाचम् हृदय हर्षिणीम् ||
— Valmiki Ramayan 4-3-32

Skill 10 – Speak Positive, Truthful, and Soothing Words
It is not sufficient to have a marvellous speech applauded by everyone, but your speech should be comforting and useful to your audience. Hate speeches are not the best even if they excel in all the previous nine effective communication traits.
Direct translation of kalyaneem is auspicious, and hrudaya harshaneem means ‘soothing to hear.’ We can easily interpret these as positive, truthful, and soothing to others. #SpreadPositivity.

Words are powerful. Words can build a big city and can destroy castles. The same sentiment is expressed by Thiruvalluvar in Thirukkural.

தீயினாற் சுட்டபுண் உள்ளாறும் ஆறாதே
நாவினாற் சுட்ட வடு.
— Thirukkural 129

The fire-burnt wounds do find cure
but harsh words create permanent sore.

Everything coming out from the human body stinks. We have control only over our thoughts, words, and actions, so let us make them positive and useful.

The Role of Body Language in Communication

One more important attribute for effective communication skill is explained in an earlier sloka 4-3-30.

#BodyLanguageAndSpeech

न मुखे नेत्रयोर्वापि ललाटे च भ्रुवोस्तथा।
अन्येष्वपि च गात्रेषु दोषस्संविदितः क्वचित् ||
— Valmiki Ramayan 4-3-30

No fault can be found in his face, eyes, forehead, between the eyebrows, or any other part of his body (during his communication).

Apart from his verbal communication expertise, Hanuman uses his nonverbal cues very effectively, as per Lord Ram’s assessment of Hanuman’s communication expertise.

Before we talk about why body language is important in communication, let’s first find out what body language is. A host of non-verbal cues and signs make up our body language. Making the right cues when speaking and knowing how to read and interpret these signs are vital in communication.

Body language assists us in understanding and decoding what the person is saying. It also helps us to interpret others’ moods and emotions. Moreover, it enhances our conscious understanding of people’s reactions to what we say and how we say it.

Why Positive Body Language is Essential

Why is body language important in communication? In a world of virtual communication, imagine the difference between a virtual meeting with video enabled and video disabled. At least the tone of the speech is important in an audio-only communication.

Keep your body language positive. Keeping a positive body language suggests that you are approachable, attentive, and open to new ideas. If a speaker gives off negative body language, then the audience is more likely to lose interest in what he/she is saying, and the importance of the presented information will not be perceived no matter how engaging the speech is.

Types of Body Language in Communication

Facial Expressions
The human face can convey countless emotions without saying a word. It is extremely expressive. Facial expressions are important and universal.

Body Movement & Posture
Have you ever considered how your perception of people is affected by the way they sit, walk, or stand? The way a person moves or carries themselves communicates a wealth of emotions to the world. Your posture, bearing, and stance are some prominent types of non-verbal communication.

Gesture
The fabric of our daily lives is woven by gestures. We wave, point, or beckon at something or somebody. The meaning of some gestures is different in different cultures.
For instance, the “OK” sign made with the hand is considered offensive in countries such as Germany, Russia, or Brazil. However, the OK sign usually conveys a positive message in English-speaking countries. Therefore, to avoid misinterpretation, it is very important to be careful of how you use gestures.

Eye Contact
An important element of the non-verbal communication mode is eye contact. Because the visual sense is dominant for most people. How you look at someone can communicate many different feelings. For instance, you can express inflexion, hostility, interest, or attraction through eye contact. Moreover, eye contact is important in maintaining the flow of the conversation. Also, it helps gauge the other person’s interest and response.

Tone of Language
While your tone might not be considered part of body language, it is an important aspect of non-verbal communication. People read your voice tone in addition to listening to your words when you speak.
Moreover, everyone pays attention to the timing and pace of a speech. Use your tone of language appropriately to indicate sarcasm, anger, affection, or confidence.